Fresh Fruit

Growing up, I have experienced a plethora of dinner experiences with my Iranian best friend, Ayla. I have eaten hundreds of dinners at her house. I remember the first dinner I had there. I was in third grade and our friendship was just starting to blossom. I sat down with her family and I was immediately drawn to the array of items. I remember being shocked by how many options and how much food there was. There were large bowls full of colorful vegetables, rice, chicken, and salad. At my family dinners, typically my food was not presented in large bowls but rather my mom organized and pre-made my plate. While conversing with her family, I immediately felt at home. The food was delicious and her family was warm and inviting. After finishing my first plate, I was pressed for seconds, thirds. By the end of the meal, I was so full but I was content. I remember just feeling like I fit right in. It was almost like I had known her family for years. The conversation continued after our food and we lingered for at least and hour, just talking. Once we got up from the table, I tried to clean up my dishes but her mother grabbed them out of my hands and insisted that she would do it. She was so hospitable and to this day, she still will not let me do any dishes. After the meal, Ayla and I went upstairs and within an hour, her mom brought up fresh, cut-up fruit, crisp apples and sweet oranges for dessert. To this day, my dinner experiences at her house are the same exact way: the delectable rice and vegetables and of course, the fresh fruit afterwards. Growing up with her family has made me absolutely adore Persian culture. I remember being young and almost wishing I was Persian because I admired their traditions and cuisine. If I have children when I grow up, I hope to replicate this warm and loving dinner experience in my household. 

My Name

Honestly, my name really isn't that special to me. I almost feel like it doesn't suit me and it was almost a compromise. To clarify, my name was chosen by a nurse. My parents had not chosen my name before my birth. They had easily decided on my twin sister's name, Nicole, because she was named after a deceased family member. When the time of our delivery came, my parents had not prepared a name. When I came out of my mother's womb, one of the nurses simply said, "Oh she looks like a Meghan!" My parents liked it and that was that. I just feel like my name has no special significance, it was just a simple recommendation made by a stranger. My middle name, Rose, does have some significance. It was my great-grandmother's name which I think is pretty cool. Back to my first name, it also bugs me the way people say my name. Most people mispronounce my name and say, "May-ghan" rather than "Meh-ghan." It doesn't really matter that much to me but the fact that even my own mother mispronounces my name irks me. Also, my name seems to always be misspelled as there are about ten different ways to spell my name. Reflecting on these name annoyances, I understand Gogol's frustrations regarding his name. It bugs him when people mispronounce it or ask questions and I understand why now. When people mispronounce his name, it's almost like they are disregarding the significance, even if it isn't purposeful. Unlike Gogol, my name does not make me feel insecure but sometimes I do wish that I could change it. For now, Meghan will just have to do. 

Heritage

To be honest, my heritage has not really affected my life that much but I will give you a little family history. On my dad's side, his great-grandfather lived in a poor village in Greece when he decided to leave and take a risk. He traveled to America in the early 1900s, in search for a better life. He ended up in Utah, where he bought his own land where he tended his sheep and eventually grew his property. A few years ago, I visited his land in Park City, Utah. I was shocked. I had pictured a small, farm property and I discovered roughly 7000 acres of land. This to me sums up the American dream. A poor, Greek man travels to America with nothing but the shirt on his back and he ends up growing his property. But this sums up about all I know of my family history! I know that my dad is Greek and Italian. My mom is some kind of European mutt, consisting of Swedish, German, French, Scottish...ect...I personally identify with my mother's heritage more than my father's. I feel that I look more Swedish than Italian (thanks to my pasty skin and blonde hair!) I wish that I could identify more with my heritage but I am very curious about my exact percentages of nationalities. I hope to use the 23 and me program which basically tells you exact percentages of which ethnicities you are! I hope to do this within the year because perhaps I will be able to truly identify and celebrate my heritage. 

The link for 23 and me! 
https://www.23andme.com/

Irrationality and Risk-Taking

Humans are irrational. We act on irrational impulses even though we know that our actions can lead to negative consequences. As humans, we are defined by our irrationality. This thought process can be seen through every invention, every experiment in history. People do not make the history books for rational behavior. Unfortunately, for the most part, rational actions do not yield unexpected results. For example, if a man follows the same routine everyday: wake up, eat the same breakfast, go to work, return home, sleep, it will be monotony and there will be no expression or change. Humans must experiment in life and try new things in order to learn and develop further. I try to take risks everyday. I want to push myself out of my comfort zone, however uncomfortable this will make me. For example, auditioning for musicals or plays is extremely nerve-wracking and makes me uncomfortable but it's a risk I am willing to take. I would much rather sit at home, curled up with a book but I choose to subject myself to anxiety and possibly even disappointment. I know that the risk I take can lead to bad results, for example, not getting cast in a play. But with unfortunate consequences can also come unexpected and amazing results for example, being cast in the school play. Taking risks is necessary for the human experience and from irrational behavior, amazing things can blossom. 

I am Contradictory and Irrational

I am human and I am full of contradictions. Contradictions are so hard to avoid because we as humans are irrational. I often pride myself on being honest and genuine but I often find myself contradicting my beliefs. For example, I never let my sister borrow my clothes but when I want to borrow something out of her closet, I become angry when she does not let me borrow her clothes. This obviously would frustrate her and I completely understand. There really isn't a way for me to justify my actions because I can recognize my own hypocrisy. Another example is I contradict myself in my own beliefs in animal rights. I am vegan (I do not eat dairy or meat) and I have a huge respect and love for animals yet I wear leather shoes and have leather bags. This is so hypocritical yet I still continue to purchase animal goods. I do have a justification for my actions though. If I were to eat a piece of meat, I would enjoy it for a few seconds before it would disappear, an animal's life wasted just for a few seconds of enjoyment. However, owning a nice pair of shoes or a bag, I will be able to enjoy and use these products for years. I realize that I am full of contradictions in many aspects of my life but I have come to the conclusion that these hypocritical thoughts are virtually impossible to avoid because I am an irrational human. 

Petruchio and Kate: Yikes!

Notes for Petruchio and Kate's first counseling session:
I have never meet such a poorly matched couple! Petruchio and Kate are so ill-matched that it seems impossible that they will ever work out their issues. When they came into my office, they were already arguing. Petruchio had ripped off Kate's hat when they opened the door, and in a fit of anger, she hit him! What an entrance! They continued to bicker over which seats they wanted and they were not pleased to discover that there was one couch for them to share. Petruchio sat at one end and Kate the other. I couldn't believe my eyes! Are they really married? I doubted that any romantic relationship was happening. Once the couple settled down, it was clear that there was a struggle for power. Kate and Petruchio continued to argue over each other and I didn't even get to ask any questions because they kept arguing! They were arguing about their terrible ride over and how Kate had fallen in mud and Petruchio yelled and Kate prayed...ect. Once I was finally able to speak (30 minutes later, mind you) I asked one question: "Let's introduce ourselves so we can truly get to know each other and feel confortable: I am Dr. Condas, what are your names or what would you liked to be called?" Katherine said, "My name is Katherine and I this is what I would like to..." before Petruchio interjected yelling, "KATE! YOUR NAME IS KATE!" I was obviously shocked. This couple couldn't even figure out their names and I began to doubt their marriage. After this awkward exchange, I realized the huge problem for this couple: they were just too similar. They always say "opposites attract" and this case, it is extremely correct. Petruchio and Kate are equally headstrong, argumentative, and rude and this is the main reason they can't seem to get along. I proceeded to ask them more questions about their relationship, "Who wears the pants in this relationship?" to which both individuals responded, "me!" I was lost for words. As I scribbled notes in my notebook, they continued to shout and scream as I observed their behavior. It was like watching a tennis match, the ball going back and forth repeatedly. Before I knew it, our session was up and I was relieved. I have spent 15 years in this business and I have never seen such a couple in this kind of distress. I have no short-term goals for this couple as I feel more sessions are in order to completely assess the situation. One long-term goal I have for the couple is I want them to begin to respect each other as equals and to stop arguing so much. I hope that Petruchio and Kate will return back to my office as I feel they really need some help. Phew, my head is killing me!

To Change or Not to Change?

It has been a tradition for hundreds of years: a woman changes her maiden name to her husband's last name after marriage. It has been a point of discussion in the last few decades. I personally think that the woman should be able to make this decision for herself. If a woman feels inclined to change her name, she should change it. If she doesn't feel comfortable changing her name or wishes to keep her maiden name simply for personal reasons, this is acceptable too. I can see why this may be seen as
"ridding of the woman's identity" but I think if the name change is made for the right reasons and has the consent of the woman, I don't think it really matters. 

In regards to The Taming of the Shrew, when Petruchio renames Katherine, "Kate," it does change  her identity. Katherine protests to this new name, and to her dislike, he decides to permanently rename her which robs her of her identity. Her name gives her power. Her name reminds her peers of her great talent with language, something that she is proud of. "Kate" is an unfamiliar name to her and her peers, bringing feelings of ownership and confusion. In comparing the play to current times, it is important to consider how time period plays a part in this dilemma. During Shakespeare's time, women were objects to marry off, pawns on a chess board, waiting to be taken by a knight. Although in some cases this is true of women today, generally, women have the right to decide whether or not to change their maiden name or not, a power that should not be taken away.